How to protect a child from his father. How to protect a child from his father? Regulatory documents on children's rights

Hello. If you want the child’s father not to communicate with him or to communicate under certain conditions in place and time, then in the first case you need to file a claim for deprivation of parental rights, in the second case with a claim to determine the order of communication with the child.

Please keep the following in mind:
Family code
Article 69. Deprivation of parental rights
Parents (one of them) may be deprived of parental rights if they:
evade the fulfillment of parental responsibilities, including malicious evasion of child support payments;
refuse, without good reason, to take their child from a maternity hospital (ward) or from another medical organization, educational institution, social service organization or similar organizations;
abuse their parental rights;
abuse children, including physical or mental violence against them, encroach on their sexual integrity;
are patients with chronic alcoholism or drug addiction;
committed an intentional crime against the life or health of their children, the other parent of the children, a spouse, including a non-parent of the children, or against the life or health of another family member.
Article 70. Procedure for deprivation of parental rights
1. Deprivation of parental rights is carried out in court.
Cases of deprivation of parental rights are considered upon the application of one of the parents or persons replacing them, an application from the prosecutor, as well as upon applications from bodies or organizations charged with protecting the rights of minor children (guardianship and trusteeship authorities, commissions for minors, organizations for orphans and children left without parental care, and others).
2. Cases of deprivation of parental rights are considered with the participation of the prosecutor and the guardianship and trusteeship authority.
Article 66. Exercise of parental rights by a parent living separately from the child
1. A parent living separately from the child has the right to communicate with the child, participate in his upbringing and resolve issues regarding the child’s education.
The parent with whom the child lives should not interfere with the child’s communication with the other parent, if such communication does not harm the child’s physical and mental health or his moral development.
2. Parents have the right to enter into a written agreement on the procedure for the exercise of parental rights by a parent living separately from the child.
If the parents cannot come to an agreement, the dispute is resolved by the court with the participation of the guardianship and trusteeship authority at the request of the parents (one of them). At the request of the parents (one of them) in the manner established by civil procedural legislation, the court, with the obligatory participation of the guardianship and trusteeship authority, has the right to determine the procedure for the exercise of parental rights for the period before the court decision enters into legal force.
3. In case of failure to comply with a court decision, the measures provided for by the legislation on administrative offenses and the legislation on enforcement proceedings are applied to the guilty parent. In case of malicious failure to comply with a court decision, the court, at the request of a parent living separately from the child, may make a decision to transfer the child to him based on the interests of the child and taking into account the opinion of the child.
4. A parent living separately from the child has the right to receive information about his child from educational institutions, medical organizations, social service organizations and similar organizations. The provision of information may be refused only if there is a threat to the life and health of the child on the part of the parent. Refusal to provide information may be challenged in court.

Sincerely, Dmitry Baklanov! I hope that my answer was useful to you.

As a child grows, he enters into a variety of relationships with the people around him. They, in turn, belong to different social groups. The goal of development is the formation of a child as an individual. He must become part of the world in which he resides and acts.

First relationship

Family is the first space in which a child lives from birth. The first relationships he enters into are with his father and mother, sisters and brothers. For the child, they act as the foundation, the center of all other social connections that he will form and establish subsequently.

Child's rights

From his very birth, a person is taken under state protection. At any age, he is a member of society. The child has the right:

Have a surname, patronymic and first name.
Raise and live in a family.
Communicate with relatives and parents.
Change last name and first name.
Have property.
Protect your own rights.
Receive medical care.
Express your own opinion.
Get an education, etc.

IN modern society Unfortunately, they are often violated by both the state and parents. Next, we will consider how the protection of the rights and interests of children is ensured.

Basic provisions

The protection of the rights of minor children is regulated by current regulations. The main one is the Constitution. The Law on the Protection of the Rights of the Child contains provisions providing for its protection from the encroachments of parents. Mainly, this ensures the responsibility of those who are dependent on it and protects against abuse. In case of cruel treatment, a child has the right to appeal to the guardianship and guardianship authority, and from the age of 14 – to the court.

Parents and other citizens

The protection of the rights of the child is carried out primarily by his father and mother. However, there are situations in society when these functions are assigned to guardianship and guardianship authorities. This is possible if contradictions are established between the interests of children and parents, if the latter are deprived of their rights and have limited legal capacity due to alcohol abuse. Social protection of children's rights is provided by officials and other citizens. If they become aware of a possible threat to health, life, infringement of freedoms, facts of cruel treatment of a minor, they are obliged to report this to the guardianship and guardianship authority. Upon receipt of this information, the latter must take measures to eliminate these phenomena.

Criminal liability

The protection of the rights of the child in the family is under the control of the Criminal Code. In Art. 156, in particular, establishes full criminal liability for evasion of educational duties if this act is accompanied by cruel treatment of a minor. The latter can be expressed in failure to provide food, systematic humiliation, beatings, bullying, and being locked in a room alone for a long time. The protection of children's rights is entrusted to the guardianship and guardianship authorities at district administrations, the PDN inspection at the police department, the prosecutor's office (in particular, the assistant prosecutor authorized to carry out this activity), and the KDN.

In case of non-fulfillment or improper fulfillment of duties related to education, a parent and other person to whom they are assigned, as well as a teacher and other employee of an educational medical, educational and other institution that must exercise supervision, if these actions are accompanied by cruel treatment, liability is provided. . In particular, a fine of 50 to 10 minimum wages may be imposed, freedom may be restricted for a period of up to 2 years, with or without deprivation of the opportunity to hold a particular position or perform certain activities for three years. Cruel treatment, including mental and physical violence, and an attempt on the sexual integrity of a minor serve as grounds for deprivation of parental rights. This provision is established in Art. 69 Family Code.

Work of the prosecutor's office

The protection of children's rights is carried out by guardianship and guardianship authorities, as well as law enforcement agencies. The latter should include the prosecutor's office and the police department. The prosecutor protects the rights of children in the following ways:

Filing a claim for deprivation of the mother and (or) father of parental rights or their limitation, as well as cancellation of adoption.
Direct participation in court proceedings in cases of protection of children's rights.
By introducing warnings about the inadmissibility of violating the freedoms of a minor and ideas about their elimination.
Submitting applications to the guardianship and guardianship authority or the court with a demand for restoration or recognition of the disputed or infringed right of the child.
Protesting acts of administrative bodies that carry out tasks to preserve the freedoms of minors.

Activities of the Department of Internal Affairs

Internal Affairs bodies take part in the enforcement of decisions regarding the search for persons who evade the execution of court decisions related to the upbringing of children. The tasks of police officers also include carrying out individual preventive work with parents who do not fulfill or improperly fulfill their responsibilities for training, education, and maintenance of minors. Officials are involved in detecting facts of violations and infringements of the child’s freedoms in the family. If necessary, employees prepare cases for restriction and deprivation of parental rights.

KDN

The protection of children's rights in the Russian Federation is also ensured by a special Commission. Her responsibilities include:

Filing a claim in court regarding the restriction or deprivation of parental rights.
Taking measures to restore and protect the interests of children, identifying and eliminating the conditions and causes that contribute to their homelessness and neglect.
Preparation of information provided to the judicial authority on issues related to ensuring the freedoms of minors.
If necessary, organize control over the conditions of detention, education and training of minors.

Guardianship and guardianship authorities

Their tasks include identifying children who are left without parents and keeping records of them. In accordance with the specific circumstances of the loss of guardianship of the mother or father, these authorities choose the forms of placement of minors. At the same time, they carry out further supervision over the conditions of their education, maintenance and upbringing. In addition, guardianship and guardianship authorities:

Act as defendants in cases of lifting restrictions and restoring parental rights.
Claims are filed regarding the removal of a mother or father from raising, educating, or maintaining dependents.
They give opinions regarding the cancellation or establishment of adoption, disputes related to education and participate in the consideration of these cases.

Modern realities

Today, in almost all guardianship and guardianship authorities, the functions of protecting the rights of minors are usually performed by one employee - an inspector. As a result, all work, as a rule, comes down to the fact that only urgent actions can be carried out. They are mainly related to representation in court, preparation of various, often unprofessional due to the lack of appropriate skills and knowledge, opinions upon request judicial authority. In this regard, the protection of children's rights is not carried out properly. This, in turn, requires taking measures to reform this system.

Priority directions

In court, the protection of rights concerns cases of violations occurring in the family, if controversial situation. Ensuring the preservation of the freedoms of minors, especially those who have lost parental care, falls within the scope of activity of the relevant authorities. In this regard, administrative protection is a priority today. It is the guardianship and guardianship bodies that are authorized by the state to perform these functions. Tasks can be implemented in different ways, in accordance with a particular situation.

The most important prerequisite for ensuring the protection of children’s rights by these bodies is their close contact with the Control Department, the Department of Internal Affairs, the prosecutor’s office and other public and state institutions. It should be recognized that most of the regulations governing this area are primarily aimed at defining the role of departments and establishing the boundaries of their competence. In this regard, interdepartmental barriers and the struggle for budget funds are intensifying, despite the fact that the mechanism of influence and responsibility of these bodies for failure to fulfill their functions is not spelled out.

Article 56 SK

The Family Code enshrines the child’s ability to independently protect their rights. In cases of violations on the part of the father or mother, as well as other persons replacing them, he can appeal to the guardianship and guardianship authority, and after 14 years - to the court. However, in practice this provision is almost never implemented. This is primarily due to the fact that the Civil Procedure Code does not define the status of a minor during civil proceedings if he has lost parental care. Thus, this function is transferred to the guardianship and guardianship authorities. They must accept the child’s complaints and take corrective action.

International protection of children's rights

There is a special Convention in force in the world, ratified by almost all countries except Somalia and the United States. This document not only recognizes the child as a person endowed with certain rights. The Convention enables him to assert his freedoms through national administrative and judicial procedures. Today Russia is obliged to periodically submit reports to the Committee for the Protection of the Rights of the Child of the UN Organization. They reflect the situation of persons under 18 years of age in the country. The Committee for the Protection of the Rights of the Child acts as a mechanism for implementing the Convention. Its provisions are considered universal. As many experts note, one of the most significant contributions of the Convention to human rights legislation is the introduction of the principle of transferring the child from a “passive” object to an active subject of protection.

the main problem

Of particular relevance today is the issue of children deprived of a family. They, for the most part, find themselves thrown out onto the street due to various difficult situations. Such children, as a rule, live in terrible conditions and are victims of one or another type of violence. Many of them have various serious illnesses. Most of these children were unlikely to have ever attended school or are no longer in school. If they survive violence, hunger, prostitution, social alienation, police harassment, various kinds consequences associated with breaking rules and regulations, drug use, low-paid jobs, imprisonment, then they will grow up to become illiterate adults lost to the state. This problem must be solved by all interested bodies and persons. The state undoubtedly plays a special role in this.

Finally

A child is every person under 18 years of age unless, in accordance with the rules of law applicable to that person, he or she becomes an adult earlier. This category of citizens is considered the most valuable capital of the state and society. Mutual understanding and continuous communication between all generations are of utmost importance. This is an essential condition for the stable existence of the modern world.

21 Mar 2016 13:07 No. 488615 Novosibirsk

Nina

Hello! My husband and I have been divorced for 13 years, our daughter will turn 17 on April 1st. Ex-husband abuses alcohol, does not work, does not pay child support, and does not take part in the child’s life. I suspect that he has large debts on bank loans. In this regard, I am concerned about the following questions: 1) can his debt obligations pass to his daughter after she reaches adulthood? 2) Does he have the right to file for child support? 3) How to protect her from his debts and alimony? Thank you in advance. Nina, Novosibirsk

Lawyers' answers 1

21 Mar 2016 17:42 No. 1372635

Good afternoon, Nina.

The issues you are interested in are regulated by Articles 87-88 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation, as well as Art. 1175 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation.

By virtue of Art. 87 of the RF IC, able-bodied adult children are obliged to support and care for their disabled parents in need of help. In the absence of an agreement on the payment of alimony, alimony for disabled parents in need of help is collected from able-bodied adult children in court. The amount of alimony collected from each child is determined by the court based on the financial and marital status of the parents and children and other noteworthy interests of the parties in a fixed amount of money payable monthly. When determining the amount of alimony, the court has the right to take into account all able-bodied adult children of a given parent, regardless of whether the claim is made against all children, one of them, or several of them.

It should be noted that children may be released from the obligation to support their disabled parents in need of help if the court finds that the parents evaded their duties as parents. Children are exempt from paying child support to parents deprived of parental rights.

At the same time, in accordance with Part 3 of Art. 38 of the Constitution of the Russian Federation, able-bodied children who have reached the age of 18 must take care of disabled parents. The corresponding norms of the previously mentioned family legislation correspond to this provision of the Constitution.

Now, regarding your questions.

“Can his debt obligations pass to his daughter after she reaches adulthood?” - no, credit obligations cannot automatically transfer, just as partial liability for the payment of debt (credit) obligations of parents by children cannot arise.

The father's debts can be attributed to the daughter if she inherits the property (if any) of a relative-father, that is, accepting responsibility for debts made by him and not paid during his lifetime, for example, on loans. A loan or mortgage is an outstanding obligation and must be repaid by the heirs. According to Article 1175 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation, the debts of the testator must be paid by his heirs. The law allows you to refuse to pay debts remaining after the death of a relative. But in order not to pay the debt obligations of the deceased, it will be necessary to renounce the inheritance. Moreover, the refusal must be formalized by a notary.

This way the daughter is released from liability for her father’s debts. The transfer of debt obligations to a daughter during her lifetime is impossible.

“Does he have the right to file for child support?” - yes, the father has such a right, however, taking into account the factual circumstances you outlined, the requirements of the law and existing judicial practice, such a claim will have little prospects.

Firstly, alimony payments are due to pensioners (men over 60 years old), disabled people of groups 1 and 2, as well as needy persons. The needy includes people who need money for food; utility bills; medicines. According to these conditions, children are required to pay child support to disabled parents who cannot provide for themselves and need financial support.

I note that the father will be able to collect alimony only through the court, and he will need to meet the requirement of incapacity for work (be a pensioner) and confirm his status of need for help.

Secondly, in judicial practice Estimated circumstances are identified that significantly influence the amount of alimony collected or exempt from the obligation to pay alimony.

The legislation defines conditions under which, if proven, children may not pay money as support to elderly parents, even if they are disabled. These include cases where a parent in the past avoided fulfilling his direct responsibilities to the child; in the event of a divorce, the person in question had no further contact with the child; did not take part in his upbringing and maintenance, did not ensure that he received an education. the parent did not pay child support when he reached working age or paid, but not in full size or not regularly; if there has been a restriction or deprivation of parental rights.

Evidence of the stated arguments may include testimony from neighbors, relatives, friends, acquaintances, the fact of long-term separation, and other circumstances.

Based on the above, the father has the opportunity to file a claim for alimony, however, taking into account the factual circumstances of your case, the daughter may be exempt from paying alimony, due to the previously stated legal position.

“How to protect her from his debts and alimony?” - There are the following methods.

1) Art. 87 of the RF IC stipulates that children are exempt from paying alimony to parents deprived of parental rights, therefore depriving the father of parental rights will resolve the issue in your favor and completely limit the possibility of collecting alimony.

2) As previously reported, debt obligations can pass to the daughter only if she accepts her father’s inheritance after his death. A waiver of inheritance certified by a notary will prevent the possibility of debts being transferred to the daughter.

I am ready to answer your additional questions.

Sincerely!

22 Mar 2016 9:15 No. 1372657 Novosibirsk

Nina

Thank you very much for your detailed answer, if possible, answer one more question. I read that the procedure for depriving parental rights is very long and complicated. Is this true in practice? Thank you

22 Mar 2016 12:11 No. 1372660

Indeed, depriving a father of parental rights is a rather complex procedure associated with emotional experiences. The procedure for depriving parental rights is regulated by Art. 70 Family Code Russian Federation, by virtue of which deprivation is carried out in court. This category of cases is considered upon the application of one of the parents or persons replacing them, an application from the prosecutor, as well as upon applications from bodies or organizations charged with protecting the rights of minor children (guardianship and trusteeship authorities, commissions for minors, organizations for children). orphans and children left without parental care, and others).

To resolve the issue in a positive way, you will need to have one or more grounds for deprivation of parental rights. These include:

1) Parents’ avoidance of fulfillment parental responsibilities, including malicious evasion of payment of alimony (i.e. parents do not care about health, moral education, physical, mental, spiritual development, material and living support, education of the child, preparing him for work, and also do not support the child without good reason);

2) refusal of parents without good reason to take their child from the maternity hospital (ward) or from another medical institution, educational institution, institution social protection the public or from other similar institutions. The fact that a minor child has a physical or physical disability cannot be regarded as a basis for deprivation of parental rights. mental development(upon application or with the consent of parents) in institutions of the social protection system, including minors under the age of fifteen in a psychiatric hospital

3) abuse of parental rights by parents (i.e., use of parental rights to the detriment of the interests of children, for example, creating obstacles in education, inducing begging, theft, drunkenness, prostitution, drinking alcohol or drugs, etc.)

4) cruel treatment of children by parents, including physical or mental violence against them (we are talking about beatings, beating the child, threats against him, instilling a feeling of fear, etc.), as well as an attempt on their sexual integrity. In addition to facts of violence, child abuse can also manifest itself in the use of unacceptable methods of raising children that harm their moral development, as well as in neglectful, rude, degrading treatment, insult or exploitation of children. Parental abuse of a child may serve as grounds for initiating criminal proceedings against the parents. Attempting the sexual integrity of children is a criminal offense

5) parents’ illness with chronic alcoholism or drug addiction, confirmed by an appropriate medical report. To deprive parents of parental rights on this basis, in principle, it is enough to establish the fact that the parents have such diseases, since they pose a particular danger to the child. The child finds himself in an unhealthy family environment, left to his own devices, and suffers morally and physically. It is not necessary for the parents to commit illegal actions against the child, although they usually occur. To establish whether parents have chronic alcoholism or drug addiction and the degree of influence of these diseases on children, it is possible to conduct a special examination (narcological, psychiatric, psychological, etc.).

When parental rights are deprived of parents suffering from chronic alcoholism or drug addiction, their guilt is obviously not traceable. However, due to the fact that alcoholism and drug addiction arise as a result of parents deliberately bringing themselves to such a state, then in this case we can talk about the guilty behavior of the parents. Although in practice, when considering this category of cases, the issue of parental guilt is not discussed. The important thing is that chronic alcoholism and drug addiction of parents create a real threat to the child, his physical, mental and moral development, confirmed by relevant medical documents. Deprivation of parental rights on this basis can be carried out regardless of the recognition of the parent as having limited legal capacity.

It is worth noting that the trial can be lengthy and costly in terms of your nerves and money for lawyers.

79156469970, [email protected]

Hello. My sister divorced her husband 9 years ago. They have joint child, who is now 15 years old. He now lives with his grandparents (our parents). For 9 years I did not take part in raising the child. I paid alimony until 2011. IN Lately terrorizes her sister with calls and text messages with threats and insults. He also communicates rudely with the child: he can laugh at him in front of strangers, insult him, say all sorts of nasty things about his mother and turn him against his mother. The sister does not live with the child now, since there is no work in the village and she was forced to leave for Krasnoyarsk. She wanted to file for arrears of alimony since 2011, but he stole the writ of execution from her. She is now trying to restore it. Alimony is still not paid. He constantly threatens his sister that he will deprive her of parental rights and tells the child that he will send him to live in a boarding school, constantly putting psychological pressure on the child. He came to the village, went to school and said that his grandfather and grandmother were constantly drinking and were not watching him. The school came to check on them. Although my grandmother works in the village library, every day she is in full view of the entire village. THIS IS A COMPLETE Slander AGAINST THEM! The child has now told him that he does not want to communicate with him anymore. To which he replied that this is not the first person who will come with an inspection. Tell me, is it possible to stop his actions with the letter of the law and somehow punish him? I no longer go into detail that in his youth he had a suspended criminal record and constantly beat his sister. They wrote a statement, but his son-in-law was in court. It all ended only with the night he spent in prison. TELL ME WHAT TO DO? I want to protect my nephew, mom, dad and sister, and according to the LAW!!! REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO YOUR REPLY!!! Thanks in advance for your free consultation!

Hello Julia.

Your sister can apply to the court to deprive the child’s father of parental rights, since there are grounds for this.

If temporary guardianship of a child is granted to a grandmother or grandfather, they can go to court instead of the mother as the child’s legal representatives. If guardianship has not been formalized, this must be done, since the mother’s residence separately from the child without registration of temporary guardianship for the persons with whom the child lives may become big problem. The child has the right to even be removed from the family.

The child also has the right to independently contact the guardianship authorities or the court.

According to Family Code RF:

Article 56. The child’s right to protection

Protection of the rights and legitimate interests of the child is carried out by parents (persons replacing them), and in cases provided for by this Code, by the guardianship and trusteeship authority, the prosecutor and the court.

A minor, recognized in accordance with the law as fully capable before reaching the age of majority, has the right to independently exercise his rights and obligations, including the right to defense.

2. The child has the right to protection from abuse by parents (persons replacing them).

In the event of a violation of the rights and legitimate interests of a child, including in the event of non-fulfillment or improper fulfillment by parents (one of them) of the responsibilities for the upbringing, education of the child, or in the case of abuse of parental rights, the child has the right to independently apply for their protection to the guardianship and trusteeship authority, and reaching the age of fourteen years in court.

3. Officials of organizations and other citizens who become aware of a threat to the life or health of a child, a violation of his rights and legitimate interests, are obliged to report this to the guardianship and trusteeship authority at the place of the child’s actual location. Upon receipt of such information, the guardianship and trusteeship authority is obliged to take the necessary measures to protect the rights and legitimate interests of the child.

Article 69. Deprivation of parental rights

evade the fulfillment of parental responsibilities, including malicious evasion of child support payments;

refuse, without good reason, to take their child from a maternity hospital (ward) or from another medical organization, educational institution, social welfare institution or similar organizations;

abuse their parental rights;

children are cruelly treated, including physical or mental violence against them, and attacks on their sexual integrity;

are patients with chronic alcoholism or drug addiction;

committed an intentional crime against the life or health of their children or against the life or health of their spouse.

Article 70. Procedure for deprivation of parental rights

Cases of deprivation of parental rights are considered upon the application of one of the parents or persons replacing them, an application from the prosecutor, as well as upon applications from bodies or organizations charged with protecting the rights of minor children (guardianship and trusteeship authorities, commissions for minors, organizations for orphans and children left without parental care, and others).

2. Cases of deprivation of parental rights are considered with the participation of the prosecutor and the guardianship and trusteeship authority.

3. When considering a case of deprivation of parental rights, the court decides the issue of collecting child support from the parents (one of them) deprived of parental rights.

4. If the court, when considering a case on deprivation of parental rights, finds signs of a criminal offense in the actions of the parents (one of them), it is obliged to notify the prosecutor about this.

5. The court is obliged, within three days from the date of entry into legal force of the court decision on deprivation of parental rights, to send an extract from this court decision to the civil registry office at the place of state registration of the child’s birth.

Article 71. Consequences of deprivation of parental rights

2. Deprivation of parental rights does not relieve parents from the obligation to support their child.

3. Question about the future cohabitation child and parents (one of them) deprived of parental rights is decided by the court in the manner established by housing legislation.

4. A child in respect of whom the parents (one of them) are deprived of parental rights retains the right of ownership of residential premises or the right to use residential premises, and also retains property rights based on the fact of kinship with parents and other relatives, including the right to receiving an inheritance.

5. If it is impossible to transfer the child to another parent or in the event of deprivation of parental rights of both parents, the child is transferred to the care of the guardianship and trusteeship authority.

6. Adoption of a child in the event of deprivation of parents (one of them) of parental rights is permitted no earlier than six months from the date of the court decision on deprivation of parents (one of them) of parental rights.

As for threats and insults from the child’s father, this is also punishable. Study Articles 116, 119 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation, Articles 151,152 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation.

In case of threats, a statement is submitted to the police or the prosecutor's office, in case of insult to personality - to the court.

Our expert - psychologist Sofya Shnol.

Prevent suffering

Every child has two important needs. One is for those close to him to recognize his right to be who he is and to act as he can now. The other is in strong reliable rear, giving the child confidence that he is not alone, that there is someone to stand up for him. Both of these create a feeling of security and allow you to direct your energy towards development rather than survival. Safe conditions for the development of a child should be created by the adults around him, protecting not only from a direct threat to life and health, but also from what can traumatize him psychologically. A child should always feel that he has support.

Culture lost

The culture of protecting our children, unfortunately, has been partially lost. It happens that parents feel numb when a child is attacked in front of them, especially if this is done by teachers or government representatives, and this prevents them from rushing to defense at the right time. It happens that, on the contrary, they show an exaggeratedly aggressive reaction that does not correspond to the situation. As a result, in both cases the child is left alone. In the first, the parents actually leave him alone with someone else’s aggression, in the second, they direct all their attention to confronting this aggression, forgetting to sympathize with the child. Sometimes, out of powerlessness, adults indulge in general discussions about the injustice of the world - this is another way to leave a child without support.

There are situations

The need to protect a child is not always obvious to parents. There are situations that do not raise questions—when we are talking about direct physical aggression from a stranger’s adult. In these cases, for most of us, the animal instinct to protect the baby turns on by itself. It is more difficult when someone from the outside simply makes a remark to the child or a conflict situation arises with the person on whom the child depends (teacher, sports coach). What if an attempt to protect will only lead to additional troubles, the parent thinks. If there is a confrontation with another child, should you intervene? Finally, how do you understand that the child himself needs protection?

Focus on feelings: if a child is suffering, it means protection is needed.

By his side

Eat different ways protection: solve the problem without the child, do it with him or just discuss what is happening. It doesn't matter what you choose. The main thing is for the child to know that you are on his side. Even if he himself is to blame for something, it is important to convey to him that you will always help him correct the situation. Your main message should be: “No matter what happens, you are ours and we are for you.”

Ways to protect your child

1. If someone makes a remark to a child in front of you:

Tell this person that you do not allow strangers to raise your child, and offer to talk to you.

Remain silent, but later explain to the child that that person was wrong.

2. If there is a conflict at school or sports section with teacher, coach:

When you see no opportunity for dialogue with these adults, The best way protection - transfer the child to another school, another section. But it is important to explain this to him as a defense, so that he does not perceive the transfer as a punishment for some offense.

3. If your child is being harassed by other children:

A serious conversation is needed here, but not with the offenders, but with their parents.

4. In any situation:

The first step is to protect and sympathize, and postpone “debriefing” and educational conversations until later.

Evgeny Orlov, producer:

— Objectivity in relation to your own child is something from the realm of fantasy. The most important thing is to explain to children what “good” is and what “bad” is. Then there will be no need to act as a lawyer, because the child will understand whether he is doing well or not.