Test “Relationships between spouses. Catalog of psychological tests

For each question, choose one of three answer options: “yes”, “occasionally”, “no”.

Questions for your husband

1. Do you spend at least half of your free time with your wife?

2. Do you take every opportunity to praise your wife and express your admiration for her?

3. Do you refrain from comparing your wife with your mother or a friend’s wife in matters of cooking and housekeeping, if the comparison is not in favor of your wife?

4. Do you show interest in your wife’s intellectual life, the books she reads, her passions?

5. Do you thank your wife for the services she provides to you (laundry, etc.)?

6. Do you allow her to communicate with other men and accept friendly attentions from them without making jealous remarks?

7. Do you take care not to criticize your wife in front of strangers?

8. Do you still continue to court your wife, giving her gifts and constant attention?

9. Do you allow her to spend part of the money from the general budget at her own discretion?

10. Do you try to delve into your wife’s problems and help her in difficult times?

Questions for the wife

1. Do you live in the interests of your husband?

2. Do you compare him with other, more successful men?

3. Do you make efforts to make your home more comfortable?

4. Do you provide your spouse with complete freedom in his affairs?

5. Do you take your husband's taste and interests into account when purchasing certain things?

6. Do you try to spend your free time taking into account your husband’s interests?

7. When there are differences in views, do you make concessions?

8. Do you follow news and other events and facts in order to understand your husband’s intellectual interests?

9. Do you refrain from criticizing your husband's friends?

10. Do you try to diversify the menu?

11. Do you make an effort to live in harmony with your husband's mother and other relatives?

12. Do you express dissatisfaction with the way your husband manages his time?

13. Are you able to withstand financial difficulties?

Counting points

The answer “yes” is scored 0 points, “occasionally” - 1 point, “no” - 2 points. Calculate your total points.

0–5 points. Your family life and the relationships established between you are quite prosperous. Your marriage partner feels grateful towards you. Your opinion matters a lot to him. Your partner sees you as an excellent conversationalist, a reliable and caring friend.

5–10 points. There is some instability in your relationship. Sometimes there is indifference on your part, but no particular conflicts arise.

10–15 points. Relationships in your family are strained. Each spouse feels dissatisfied. There is a deep misunderstanding between you. Your partner is not interested in the reason for your actions and considers you selfish. All this leads to frequent quarrels and conflicts in the family. Because of this, the spouse finds other hobbies that are not at all related to family life. The reasons lie in your frivolous and sometimes selfish attitude towards your partner and his feelings. You need to think about this, and as soon as possible.

15–20 points. Yours family relationships are on the verge of breaking. Your partner only formally considers himself your spouse. Each of you has your own life, mutual understanding is alien to you. It is quite possible that your partner has long had other interests not related to family.

Authors of the book “Strategy family life “successfully apply fundamental economic laws to marriage and argue that things can be improved in business and personal life according to the same rules. We invite you to evaluate the quality of your relationship with your spouse using a test and learn how to maintain the “optimal temperature” in your marriage.

If you knew for sure that a hurricane would hit your city tomorrow, would you stock up on water and candy bars and board up all the windows? It would be stupid to ignore the alarm, right? Then why not consider some precautions in case your relationship with your spouse is in an emergency?

Let's continue the analogy: You know for sure that a hurricane will hit your city tomorrow because Joe, your local weather forecaster who regularly monitors the weather, has noticed warning signs. Joe's technology allowed him to predict the storm's approach—and gave us a chance to prepare for the storm's impact.

You can do the same with your relationships. As cynical as it may sound, you can learn technology that will help you predict future developments.

Economic indicators are indicators of the health of the economy. Among the most important: the unemployment rate, growth or decline of GDP, inflation and the number of new houses built in a given period.

Another well-known indicator is the “consumer confidence index,” which shows how willing people are to purchase goods and services and how they assess their prospects for the future. If you suddenly stop spending money and say that you think the end of the world is approaching—that is, that you have no confidence in the future—the index will drop noticeably.

There is another indicator that owes its appearance to economist Robert Shiller. It is called the “index of confidence in the impossibility of collapse.” It shows how convinced people are that the stock market won't crash anytime soon. There is a clear pattern here: when stock prices rise, people begin to passionately believe that the holiday on their street will last forever. The Shiller index reached its highest point in 2006 - the market was indeed sky-high at that time, but very soon it plunged into the abyss of a severe crisis. And the lowest figure was at the beginning of 2009, despite the fact that a gradual rise had already begun.

We have great respect for Schiller and would like your insight into warning signs was not limited to something like: “He stopped talking to me - what does that mean?” That's why we developed our own "Marital Confidence Index." With its help, you can “measure the temperature” of your marriage - and, moreover, do without going through all sorts of psychological tests, which are included at the end of almost any book about relationships (although we, of course, are not against either psychological tests or books about relationships). Consider this universal remedy in order to check the indicators from time to time and make sure that everything is in order.

You need to calculate your base index when there is comparative calm in your relationship with your spouse - not exactly euphoria, but no hopelessness either. To do this, answer the questions provided and add up your points. Six months later, return to these questions. Has your index become higher (more euphoric) or lower (closer to hopelessness)?

When you understand what stage of the cycle your relationship is at, you can anticipate the direction of its development and, at the moment of growth, predict the inevitable decline. We hope this will help you prepare for it and take some action.

Marital Confidence Index: Test

How satisfied are you now with the relationship you are in?

5 You constantly think about how to please him. Right now, for example, you are planning to pick up the children and go to your parents for the weekend so that he can play golf with his friends in peace.

4 You enjoy spending all your free time with him, and you regret that such an opportunity does not arise often enough.

3 Everything is fine, you quarrel less often than before.

2 You go to a bar to get drunk and pick up someone.

1 You curse your mother because for the only time in her life she managed to “sleep through” the moment when she really had to say: “He’s not a match for you.”

How much time do you spend with each other?

5 How are you Siamese twins: inseparable.

4 Nights and weekends.

3 Sunday evening.

2 Once a month, the two of you go out for dinner together - unless, of course, you forget.

1 Perhaps you have talked about something over the past two days... although it’s unlikely.

How often do you have sex?

5 More often than rabbits.

4 Every other day.

3 I can’t say exactly, but quite often.

2 We need to think...

1 We've already forgotten how to do it.

What was the general tone of your last fight?

5 We quarreled slightly, but almost immediately calmed down and began a five-hour conciliation sex.

4 We had quite a heated argument, but nothing terrible was said.

3 We said nasty things to each other, but were able to make amends.

2 We both screamed at the top of our lungs, the scandal was terrible. He left home for a while.

1 We haven't spoken since then.

How many nice things have you done for your spouse this week? (Ask him how his day was, listen sympathetically to the answer, etc. Say at breakfast " Good morning"or saying goodbye before leaving for work is not considered pleasant.)

5 You can’t count everything, but he deserves it!

3 One or two things.

2 I suspect it’s nothing, but I don’t have time to remember.

1 Are you kidding me?

When you lie in bed at night and think about your spouse, how positive thoughts do you have?

5 Entirely positive. A flower meadow, a light breeze, a picnic basket and the two of you on the grass, naked.

4 Mostly positive. You would give anything to find a free evening to give him that “special gift” you promised him for his birthday.

3 A mixture of positive and negative. Let's put it this way: you know that he is not ideal, but you are ready to tolerate him because he is better than many.

2 Mostly negative. I wish I could go on a business trip tomorrow, just to avoid hearing this constant grumbling about repairs, a car, or a bath mat (what a ridiculous reason for a quarrel!) that you forgot to buy.

1 If it were your will, they would have sent him to China long ago.

Key to the test

25-30 points: Soap bubble! You are doing very, very well, but remember: euphoria does not last forever.

15-24: Keep up the good work. Try to show your other half more often how much she means to you, and do not lose faith that you will be rewarded a hundredfold.

Now pay attention. Come back to this test every few months and take it again. If your numbers are declining, it may be time for you to take a closer look at your relationship and try to figure out what's wrong. Maybe it's time to have a serious conversation with your spouse and figure out the reasons why you are angry, feeling neglected, or lazy.

If the index increases, try to understand why (praise, gratitude, expressions of affection), and work to consolidate the results. Well, if you score the perfect score every time and pat yourself on the head with a satisfied look, let me remind you of the story of Icarus and his wings that fell apart.

Discussion

Well, why, tell me, do we need a test that is only suitable for foreigners? Eg. 1 question:.......so that my husband can play golf." Is this for a Russian man? What a crap......!

06.26.2014 13:02:19, KOKO

Comment on the article "Marriage temperature: euphoria or hopelessness? Test for spouses"

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Is there spiritual intimacy in your love relationships? - 12 questions
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How jealous are you? - 6 questions
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Is there mutual understanding in your union? - 10 questions
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How strong is your sexual attraction? - 12 questions
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Do you love your husband? - 30 questions
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Can you cheat on your husband? - 20 questions
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Are you capable of cheating on your wife? - 15 questions
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The nature of interaction between spouses in conflict situations - 10 questions
Few people manage to maintain a cool head and a clear mind when conflict reaches its climax. Have you ever thought about how you look from the outside at the critical point of anger? But in vain. Many, many people lose face and look rather unattractive when they rush into the stormy waves of scandal and lose control of their words and, more importantly, actions. A man waving his arms, pacing from corner to corner in excitement and shouting incomprehensible phrases is far from the ideal he seems to be in a calm state. The ideal of any person, except, perhaps, the inhabitants of the united kingdom of Great Britain themselves, is a true English gentleman, calm under any circumstances. Try to evaluate yourself from a new side: how much you can control yourself and whether you are able to manage yourself in conflict situations.

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Test "Relationships between spouses"

Quote by: Do you know yourself. M., 1989.

The test is designed to assess the relationship between spouses and has two questionnaires - for the wife and husband.

Instructions. You are asked to answer a series of questions. Choose the answer option that suits you best.

Questionnaire for wife

1. You cook food:

a) taking into account the taste of your husband - 6 points;

b) to your liking - 2;

c) as determined by you weekly menu - 4

2. Do you ever think that:

a) another day went by in vain, without any pleasant surprises - 2 points;

b) if you weren’t married, your life would be better - 1;

c) your life is not easy, but it’s still nice to be with him - 5.

3. You were planning to go somewhere together in the evening, but at the last moment your husband said that he was tired and wouldn’t go anywhere:

a) say that you are tired and prefer to stay at home - 5 points;

b) prepare a festive dinner at home - 6;

c) get angry and think about how to take revenge on him - 2.

4. You doubted whether your husband had committed adultery (or someone hinted at it to you), and:

a) first of all, you think whether you yourself are to blame - 6 points;

b) preparing to take revenge - 1;

c) you think that you shouldn’t pay attention - 3.

5. When you were a little girl, what made you happiest playing with:

a) with dolls - 2 points;

b) with children - 5;

c) when with dolls, when with children - 4.

6. When you were a child, you dressed in:

a) ordinary dresses for girls - 5 points;

b) preferred sports type of clothing - 4;

c) trousers and shorts - 1.

7. As a child, did you prefer:

a) games for girls, for example with dolls, - 5 points;

b) you played as adults: a teacher-doctor, a fashion model - 4;

c) boys' games, for example football, - 1.

8. How did you behave during games:

a) have always been a leader - 2 points;

b) yielded the initiative to others - 6;

c) became a leader, but not immediately, but during the game - 4?

9. You and your friends agreed to go somewhere together, but your husband is not in the mood:

a) you go alone - 4 points;

b) cancel the meeting - 6;

c) do what your husband tells you - 3.

10. If your spouse cannot go on vacation or just for the weekend with his family, you:

a) traveling alone or with children - 4 points;

b) stay at home with him - 5;

c) you stay at home, but constantly reproach him - 2.

11. My husband returned from work in a bad mood:

a) you are trying to figure out the reason - 6 points;

b) be angry that even at home he only thinks about his work - 2;

c) you guess what’s going on, but don’t pester you with questions - 5.

12. If your opinions differ:

a) you remain unconvinced - 5 points;

b) defend your position, even if it threatens to result in a scandal - 1;

c) retreat, but after that blame yourself for being soft - 2.

Answers

Up to 25 points. This is not to say that you are particularly happy in your marriage. You are inconsistent in your views. You do what you want, regardless of your husband’s opinion. Nothing is likely to change in your relationship unless your conflicts stop.

From 26 to 50 points. You are peaceful, ready to give in for the sake of your peace of mind in a dispute, but do not give up your own opinion. You know how to not only adapt, but also diplomatically “attack” when you think it is necessary or when you feel that your marriage is under threat.

More than 50 points. You are feminine, tactful, but also very decisive. Sometimes you may be unhappy with your marriage, but you do everything to strengthen it.

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Who is your husband - son, lover, rival...? Do you know that your true attitude towards your husband directly affects your role in family life?!

What can you expect in this article?

Read carefully and you will find out:

1. How and why do family relationships develop?
2. A test for women will help determine their true attitude towards their husband!
3. The test results will help you rethink and improve a lot!

How and why do family relationships develop?

When getting married, every girl in her imagination paints pictures of a happy family life: love, respect, mutual understanding... But after the wedding, lovers have to rebuild their relationship, now a family one, and each spouse chooses his role.

Unfortunately, in most cases, women (as well as men) know how to properly build these same family relationships only by hearsay. And it’s good if there was a successful example before your eyes when parents really loved and appreciated each other.

But the culture of family life in the CIS countries in most families leaves much to be desired...

You can’t tell in a nutshell what to do and how to do it...

After all, a relationship is a job like any other, and to get the results, you need to put in a lot of effort. Over time, responsibilities and worries dull feelings and you have to think about romance less and less.

“Everything is fine, and thank God!” - this is what many couples think.

But is it really good?

What role have you given yourself in your family life? Take a special test for women on their attitude towards their husbands, and you will learn a lot about yourself and your role in the family.

Test of attitude towards your husband!

A few more words...

The attitude towards your husband changes over the years, and this is normal. Some people's relationships become even stronger, while others grow apart over the years of family relationships. But if you are together, then this has a higher meaning!

Perhaps you have asked yourself more than once what attracted you to this man? Why did you choose it? The test questions will help you figure this out.

Write down your answer options so you can calculate the result later.

1. Do you notice that your husband is more attractive than other men?

a) he is my most beautiful;

b) he’s quite handsome, but that’s not important to me;

c) sometimes he is beautiful, but sometimes he is simply ugly;

d) he is cute, but some men are much more interesting than him.

2. Who is the leader in the family?

a) my husband;

b) we are equal to him;

c) it happens both ways;

3. Do you feel protected and calm next to him?

a) always;

b) partially;

d) in general, yes.

4. Is your spouse showing aggression towards you?

a) manifests, but thinks differently;

b) never;

c) it happens, and I’m unhappy with it;

d) occasionally.

5. How well do you know your husband?

a) pretty good;

b) I know a lot;

c) he still knows how to surprise me;

d) I know everything about him.

6. Is he more successful than many men around you?

a) he is successful;

b) there are more successful ones;

c) he wants people to think so;

d) he himself interferes with his success.

7. Does criticism take place in your family life?

a) he advises - I agree;

b) we try to do without it;

c) he is usually critical of me;

d) happens.

8. How do you usually spend your leisure time?

a) I want to spend time with him, but I respect his need to be alone;

b) always with him;

c) we spend time together often, even too much;

d) everyone has their own hobbies.

9. Can your spouse be called the most courageous of all the men you know?

a) rather yes, he has this quality;

b) no, I don’t need it;

c) I doubt it very much, but it suits me;

d) definitely, yes.

10. Who needs advice more often, you or your partner?

c) the same;

d) this is not accepted here.

11. How does he behave among friends?

a) he usually attracts attention to himself;

b) does not stand out, sits modestly;

d) everyone loves him very much.

12. If a dispute arises, whose word will be decisive?

a) we find a compromise;

b) making a decision always takes a lot of effort and time;

c) we are always very emotional in disputes and do not give in to each other;

d) I decide everything.

13. Have you ever wanted to leave him?

a) no, never;

b) no, but...;

d) yes, it is possible.

14. Do you have fans who try to court you?

a) no, my husband will not allow this to happen;

b) I remain faithful to my husband and stop any attempts;

c) sometimes;

d) often.

15. What does your spouse say about past relationships?

a) they evoke negative memories;

b) a feeling of resentment remains;

c) can discuss them calmly;

d) there are pleasant memories.

16. What do you think about your relationship with your husband?

a) I am very happy;

b) I love him with all my soul;

c) my opinion depends on circumstances and mood;

d) it’s nice that he treats me tenderly.

17. What do you do when he returns well after midnight?

a) waiting for him to come;

b) unobtrusively trying to find out where I was;

c) if he wants, he will tell him himself;

d) I start to make trouble.

18. What does he usually reproach you with?

a) my inability and helplessness;

b) my know-it-all attitude;

c) says, I can be harsh;

19. How do you feel about your former fan?

a) he is still close to me;

b) we are good friends;

c) we don’t intersect;

d) I tremble when I meet him.

20. Which of the following applies to you?

a) he creates opportunities for me to express myself and feel the fullness of existence;

b) I feel that he needs me;

c) he always says when something doesn’t suit him about me;

d) my husband listens to my opinion and follows my instructions.

Results of the attitude test towards your husband!

Which answer option is more common for you - a, b, c or d?

If you have more options a)…

It can be argued that you not only love your husband, you worship, adore and idolize him. Your relationship is based on understanding, trust and tenderness. You are ready to remain in the shadows and create all the conditions for him to realize himself in life and fully reveal his talents.

In many ways, you are an ideal wife, don’t forget about yourself. Only on equal terms will you both truly value each other and be able to achieve true unity, as well as realize your full potential.

If more answers b)…

You simply disappeared into your husband. You are ready to be with him day and night, take care of him and fulfill his various whims. By pleasing your spouse every day, you have completely forgotten about yourself, your interests, needs and pleasures. Such family relationships are not the best option. And your spouse most likely perceives you as a caring mother, and not as a woman. Remember about yourself, you deserve no less attention.

If your answers are dominated by letter c)…

You have an “adult” and independent partner, and you are very similar to your husband. An independent man strives to be a leader, but you compete with him all the time. What do you want to prove by wasting so much energy fighting for leadership? Is this what you wanted when you were twirling in the wedding dance? Let him know that you need his care and support. You should be tender and feminine again so that your relationship sparkles with new colors.

If more answers d)…

You are the clear leader in your family, and that suits you. Your husband has come to terms with his situation and loves you with all your needs and aspirations. Over the years of family life, your husband has become very attached to you, but it can be very uncomfortable and painful for him when you suppress him with your criticism. And you know it! You take out your frustration on him because you always wanted to be around more strong man. Perhaps you should be less strong yourself? Then, according to the law of compensation, your husband will begin to demonstrate this power.

How to improve your relationship with scents?

Yes Yes! You heard right! Fragrances have a very strong influence on men and can evoke love, tenderness, passion or other intense feelings in them. The main thing is to choose the right bouquet of aromas and choose real, high-quality perfumes for the desired mood. However, everything is already ready for you. All you have to do is decide your mood! All